milf of the month - self care and what it means to be a real milf.

Getting my 'milf' on again with JUSTINE from TANTRUMS AND TEAPARTIES today!

Let's talk about what a milf actually is. Not the grossly misogynistic term, but the term that was reinvented when JUSTINE started writing these posts. A milf is not just a mother whose the society standard of aesthetic beauty. A milf is a mom who takes care of herself and has confidence in who she is as a person outside of motherhood as well as her mom-self. A woman who takes care of herself and her kids. In essence, a milf is that mom you see on your worst day. Her hair & make up are done, her outfit is put together, her kids are all adorably dressed and happy as can be. She seems to have it all together - that's what a milf really is.

In my opinion, you can't be a milf if you never practice self care. Yes, it's important to be a good mom to your kids and focus on them but it hurts them if you never take care of yourself. How and when that takes place varies a lot from person to person. Some people need frequent breaks for themselves to keep their sanity while other take fewer, further spaced out 'mommy days'. Whatever works for you is what is best in my not-so-humble opinion. Kyle and I go on date nights from time to time and every once in a while I have a few hours to just be me. Sometimes I go out and Kyle takes on Daddy Day Care, other days he pops Seth in the stroller and they go on an adventure while I get the house to myself for a few hours. It's nice and it's a great way for me to unwind and recharge my Mommy Patience Meter. It helps me be a better mom and a better wife when I have time to take care of myself as an individual - and that's something I know a lot of people not only struggle with, but also forget that it's important.

Self care can happen in small ways too. It can be as simple as I managed to get up early and make an awesome breakfast for everyone, or I did my make up and hair in a new/creative/cute way. It can be as small as 'my outfit looks so awesome' and it just boosts my confidence and my whole demeanor brightens along with it. And I'm pretty bright and shiny to begin with, ha!

Let's be real - being a mom can wear you down and burn you out sometimes. You're not a failure for taking care of yourself. You can't be good to your littles if you can't be good to yourself.